20. Stop Watching Your Kettle

Photography by Anaya

I love the idea of just bumping into your destiny. We can't plan for that next opportunity, we can't forecast when we will bump into Mr. Right, and we don't know what is waiting around the corner. We can't plan for these things--they just happen. And it seems that if we obsess over exactly when and where and who...well, nothing much ever really does happen. It's like the watched kettle. It never boils. 

But did you ever notice that when you least expect it...when you're not paying attention...when you're just going about your business in your own way...BAM! There it is. You meet someone new. You get that job opportunity. Something exciting and fresh and unexpected comes your way. 

In the movie, "Under the Tuscan Sun," Frances Mayes is a recently divorced woman who, by chance, ends up moving to Tuscany, a place she had never traveled to before. Frustrated and depressed by her husband's betrayal and her non-existent love life, she mopes around looking just as down as she feels. Her friends try to counsel her and I love their advice. Signor Martini tells her about the train tracks that were built high in the Alps between Vienna and Venice. They built these tracks before there actually was a train in existence that could make the trip. They built the tracks because they knew one day the train would come. Likewise, Frances' friend Catherine tells her that when she was a little girl she would spend all of her time looking for ladybugs. Finally, she would fall asleep in the grass. When she woke up, she was covered in them. 

What is the common theme here? Forget about the things you want so badly you can taste them. Forget about your depression concerning work or love or family. Forget about things or people who are wasting your time. Work on yourself. Build your foundation and what you are seeking will come to you. Stop watching your kettle. It will never boil. Ask yourself what still needs to be taken care of in your own life to make you feel good and to bring you back on track? Work on your house, your resume, your fitness, your novel. Remember yourself. And focus your life fully on taking care of you. Destiny has an interesting way of just dropping the pieces into place. Take a deep breath. Lie down in the grass. Close your eyes. When you wake up, the ladybugs will be crawling all over you.